For our readers on the go, BH9021-Whoa! contributor, Marla Depew put together another Depew Queue with takeaways from the Season 1 finale. What's the gang gonna do over summer? Get new jobs? Play with deaf kids at the beach? Meet a future Superman in Paris? Ruin relationships? Who knows? But for now, let's get you up to speed with a 10-point punch from the Season 1 finale.
High school students in California are always outside since the sunny days are ideal for eating lunch on the quad and getting into fistfights with a dude in a cropped muscle shirt who calls your actress mom “washed up.”
Eye patches go with every outfit and should be employed by more than just pirates and misunderstood rich boys with black-and-blue ocular regions.
Democracy works…unless you get offered a ton of money and then immediately throw out the emotional needs of your family members along with their ballots in favor of staying in California.
Ice cream drowns sorrows if you’re wholesome teenagers who don’t drown sorrows the normal way: with Boone’s Farm.
Steve Sanders has some major abandonment issues. In this episode they’re specifically ABrandonment Issues.
Even though people have been conducting long distance relationships since at least the Pony Express, the Walshes seem to think if they move back to Minnesota all of their friendships will cease to exist, like leg warmers or Reaganomics.
Tension-filled nerd friendship + halfway-across-the-country cross-country move + an era before email and Skype = possible naked sexy time for Andrea and Brandon
Just like Spiderman’s accountant said, jobs with ginormous power come with ginormous responsibility. Jim should’ve listened to that advice.
Surprise parties make everything better, especially when they help a gentle patriarch reconnect with his family’s needs, a raise and flashy new car be damned.
Pregnancy scares can happen anytime, but they're most likely to occur at the end of the first season of a '90s teen drama. #Cliffhanger